How do we nourish the seed?

In Alma 33 the people ask Alma how they can nourish this seed? Alma, as any good teacher would, refers back to scriptures. He quotes Zenos, Zenock and Moses. He begins by talking about prayer, Zenos pretty much thanks God for hearing him in all the many many places he has cried out from, the wilderness, in his field, when he prayed for his enemies, in his house, closet and so on. I think the point was that to nourish our seed we have to turn to the Lord. Turn to him in prayer, always and everywhere. At the end of this chapter he talks about Moses. He says "a type was raised up in the wilderness, that whosoever would look upon it might live." He continues to say many looked and lived, some were so so hardened they just wouldn't look and they perished.

How crazy is that...all you would have to do is look at something and you would be saved, you would live. Or you could decide that it wouldn't work so you just wouldn't look at all. CRAZY! But when we stop and think about it...how do we apply this in our lives? What things are we "not looking" at because we have no faith in it. How could we actually "live" because we decided to take that leap of faith and look. I know there are times when I just dont' believe something would happen or someone would believe me...so I just didn't try. But I am happy for the times that I just shoved my disbelief, fears, pride and hardness of heart in the trash and focused on faith. Those are the great memories where I can really see God's hand in my life. Where I see my own personal miracles. When I lived in Japan as a missionary I had developed a friendship with one of the girls in our English class that we taught. I had decided to ask her if she wanted to learn about the gospel. But I was nervous...for some weird reason I forget that there are people searching for truth and there are people who really want to know what we have to teach. I remember the exact moment when I gulped down my fears of being inadequate to actually teach about gospel and just asked her. Turns out that she had been waiting for someone to ask. She was dying to learn and she did. We are still friends to this day and I am thankful...so thankful that I decided to experiment on the word...to just be faithful that I was doing was God wanted me to do.

Questions to ponder: What are we avoiding today? How can we better our lives by "looking" so that we might live...really live? Will I write down the things that I need to face in order to grow? Am I praying in my home, in my closets, in the field and in the wilderness?

The Experiment

The second half of Alma 32 is where he asks us to "experiment upon my words". he asks us to exercise a particle of faith, even if it is just the desire to believe. He compares the word to a seed. He says if we plant it in our heart and nourish it it will swell and we will know it is good. If we have unbelief and don't nourish it it will not grow. If the seed is not good then it will be cast away.

I often am looking for answers and seeking God's will for me. There are a lot of days when I stop and realize that my thoughts have only been for myself and not for my Heavenly Father. I really want to be better at really seeking the Lord's will everyday because I know I will accomplish more worthwhile tasks. One are that I always feel lost in is parenting. I am always asking and trying to figure out what it is I should be doing with my children. I don't know that I have felt exact guidance, I know generally what I need to be doing...pray, scriptures, family home evening and stuff like that. We always do library time once a week and playgroups with friends, but just one on one I never know what to do. Today I decided that I wanted to just listen and to just do what seems good. I knew that if it wasn't right I would feel something not clicking...that would be the bad seed...it would just be cast away. If I was doing good then I would feel it. There was a moment today while Danielle was at school and Travis and I were eating lunch. I sat there with him and we talked a bit and just were kicking back enjoying our time. We weren't in a rush, nothing was on my mind...it was just us hanging out. For a moment my mind opened up, everything seemed so clear and peaceful. I realized that the seed was good. Just spending that calm time together without any distractions was the right thing at that moment. I know Heavenly Father was telling me that it was good. I get so caught up in feeling like I need to be "doing" with my children when sometimes I need to not be "doing" anything but just being with them and enjoying them.

I think to experiment upon the word isn't just about faith in the gospel, but about our faith in all things. To experiment by placing faith in the areas we feel weak and as we nurture that seed and it swells we will perfect it and can experiment in another area and continually grow to become more like our Savior. I am so glad for the small experiences in my life...they are the ones that fine tune my faith and really anchor it to the foundation my parents raised me on.

Things to ponder today: What can experiment my faith on today? What are my weak areas that need improvement? What other experiences have I had where I can see the good seed swelling or the bad seed being cast away? How can reflecting on these experiences help me in the future?

How is your faith?

I have always felt that my faith has been strong. Any trial I have faced in my life I can honestly say I have never faced alone, I have turned to the Lord for strength and guidance. I am so happy about that. As I sit here and think about faith I realize that I have faith, but my actions are not always proving to me that it is as strong as I have thought it was. With faith we must have action or it will not grow. Alma 32 is about Alma preaching to the poor. He basically tells them that they needed to be poor and have these great afflictions because it was the only way for them to be hunbled so that they could find faith. He says something really important in verse 16, "Therefore, blessed are they who humble themselves without being compelled to be hunble; or rather, in other words, blessed is he that believeth in teh word of God, and is baptized without stubborness of heart, yea, without being brought to know the word, or even compelled to know, before they will believe."
I know that I have always believed without being compelled. It has always felt right and I tend to go with my instincts. But from there I have studied and prayed and I know the truthfulness of the gospel of Jesus Christ. I know He is the Son of God. Eventhought I know these things I do find that looking back at some of my trials I see they were given to me to become humble, to clear my vision so that I could see God's plan for me. I guess growing in faith is a continual process...duh! I think back to when I decided to go on a mission. My mind was totally closed off to going on a mission, I really didn't feel like that was the plan for me. I was at college and I had gone through a really rough year, it brought me to my knees often, I ran a lot to think about why things were so hard and one day it hit me that God's plan for me was that I needed to go and serve a mission for the church. It took an entire year to get me humble to see this plan and have the humility to go do it without question...and it was life changing and the one of the greatest blessings of my life. I am so glad my was strong enough to actually listen and that my family supported me so that I could serve the Lord in that capacity.

Here are some good questions to ask yourself for reflection:
What experiences have you had to build your faith? What were the real eye openers? How does this help you now to recognize when they Lord is trying to tell you something. Are you listening to Him now...really listening? Are you truly humble and ready to do His will?